Our beliefs are a combination of attitudes, experiences and ideas that we use to interpret our daily lives. It works like a search engine where we type in different situations or people and our belief system gives suggestions on how we should feel or behave based on past and present information. Our belief system is influenced by several factors such as our knowledge, our emotions, what we were told as kids, our religion as well as our social circle. So several factors playing at various levels create or change our belief systems. Since there are so many contributing factors, it’s possible that our beliefs may not always be an accurate picture of reality. Can you think of a belief that guides your actions? Would you say that all the information that led to this belief is complete and accurate?

Having a self limiting belief system is when we assume negative thoughts about ourselves to be true. Have you ever noticed how your beliefs lead you to match various instances to this belief? When we tell ourselves we’re never going to be successful, we start to pay greater attention to the time we failed an exam or when we didn’t get that job we wanted while completely overlooking all the achievements in your life….Can you think of a time when your negative self-talk altered your thinking and shifted your behavior to confirm a certain belief? This is because of a confirmation bias where our mind likes to hold on to information that matches our beliefs. Now let’s think of everything you have done right. All the right decisions you’ve made or how you’ve stood up for yourself! By paying attention to what you have achieved we’re able to fight our self-defeating thoughts.

Let’s understand a few other cognitive distortions that may be at play. Black and white thinking or Polarized thinking is when we start to think only in extremes. Like saying “if I don’t get into my dream college that would mean I’m a total failure”

Personalization is another thinking error where we believe that what others say or do is somehow targeted at us or has something to do with us. Let’s say there’s a fight at home and you automatically think it’s your fault and start blaming yourself even if it didn’t have anything to do with you.

So, The next time you find yourself immersed in this defeatist mindset, think about how you can re-consider that situation from a different angle. If our thoughts tell us that we’ll never be able to face a challenge, we can think of all the instances where we’ve successfully dealt with tough situations…. Or Maybe actually try and deal with whatever we’re currently facing to see how we’ll fare. If you feel like it, say the words “I am a highly capable individual.” When we believe something and we act according to our beliefs, we are able to create different neural networks in the brain that lead to new behaviour! And you have The power to choose what you want to believe and decide how you want to take action.

Let’s wrap up with a moment of mindful breathing. Slowly inhale from your nose and allow the air to fill up your body. Hold the breath for four seconds and slowly exhale from your mouth. Remember it all begins and ends in your mind what you give power to has power over you, if you allow it!